Stu Hall's Soup

S

ara and I spent a weekend in Pennsylvania recently, mostly for the purposes of clothes shopping and primarily for Sara to pick up a dress for a wedding later this year. There is no sales tax on clothing (or much else) in Pennsylvania and there are numerous outlet malls in and around the city of Lancaster.

Using Toll roads, the drive is about 8 hours. We decided to take more scenic routes and avoid toll roads, so it took longer. This was the first time that I’d driven through large amounts of New York State, and you can see why the area is known as New England. There are many familiar trees and rolling green fields scattered with dandelions. Excusing the common use of wood panelling on houses and the road signs, I could see the resemblance between here and parts of the western most areas of the West Midlands where I grew up (in particular the rural areas of Herefordshire/Worcestershire/Shropshire areas).

As incredibly tempting as it is to spend an entire column knocking Americans, I will try to keep much of it under control. The border was yet another experience, though. Not as bad as previous times, but having crossed the border by car into New York State numerous times I still believe the attitudes of the immigration control officers are generally poor and heavy handed. I don’t expect them to offer to take me out for a drink, but I also don’t appreciate being spoken to like an idiot (even if I was one) like I was this time, or having surly individuals slamming around the place because they’re so superior now they’ve been given a badge and a gun.

Sara and I talked about the attitudes of Americans and we tend to agree that the problem with American society basically comes from the top. Some of the most despicable people end up in charge and they treat the people below them like dirt. It filters down from the very top and works it’s way down through anyone with any authority. It’s no surprise that when someone gets a bit of authority after they’ve been kicked around for a while, they then start kicking out themselves. That’s how bullying works.

Another observation about America is that it’s a lot further from it’s British roots than Canada is. You hear British accents on Canadian tv and radio on a regular basis. For some reason British accents are nearly always used in commercials for cleaning products here. Winston Churchill’s statue stands proudly near City Hall (although he had a length of bird shit on his head last time I saw him). You get to see the Union Jack from time to time in Toronto. It’s in the Ontario flag, too. Of course the US Flag is red, white and blue like another flag that came before it, but there is an extreme desire to believe in freedom and independence in the USA so I’m sure America not only invented the flag from scratch, they probably invented the colours it uses too.

In Canada I am asked about my accent fairly regularly. Particularly when I’m working. I can have a day at work where up to four people will ask me where abouts in Britain I’m from. In America, I didn’t get this once. I’m undecided whether it’s because being British is to be un-American and therefore not a good thing or whether it’s simply because people are generally less chatty, less friendly than them folks up in the great white north.

People working in the service industry are treated quite harshly in the USA. In the UK, the usual phrasing when you are asking for something is to say “Can I have a mug of coffee, please?". In Canada the phrasing tends to be along the lines of “Can I get a coffee, please?". From what I heard in the US, it tends to be “I’ll take a coffee". It seemed to be fairly normal for people to just reach across and tap a waitress on the shoulder rather than just say “Excuse me". The usual suggestion is that not all Americans are arrogant and impolite, and of course that is true. However every observation that I have written about here was truly witnessed and took place in the course of just two days.

Going back to the border crossing for a moment, the usual procedure involves driving up to several lines of traffic queueing at barricades like toll-booths. At this point, travel documents (IE passports) are shown. As a non-Canadian/non-US citizen I am then made to park the car and sit in a waiting room with usually about a dozen other people of varied ethnicity. I then get called to a window where I am questioned about my plans. I have to give an address. I usually have to outline the nature of the relationship I have with Sara. I have to give my fingerprints and they take a photograph of me. They then place a card in my passport which I’m meant to surrender when I leave else it “might cause delays upon re-entry” (except nobody ever takes it). I’m then relieved of about $6.

When returning to Canada I am asked what goods I have purchased (for tax purposes), whether I have alcohol, tobacco or firearms and that’s generally it. On this occasion I was asked if I’ve been to Mexico due to the flu-outbreak. But, yeah. They then let me in. It is, however, the USA that believes above anywhere else on the planet in “freedom".

Anyway, far too much ranting.

Pennsylvania is a very pretty state. The weather wasn’t too kind to us as we arrived. There was a tourist information centre (or “center") near the border with a sign saying something like “I’m in Pennsylvania” out the back overlooking a very picturesque valley. Unfortunately is was misty from the rain and I didn’t want to kill my camera. That was the story of the first day, really. It was a nice drive with a fair bit of wildlife. Sara saw a bear by the side of the road, but I managed to miss it. We ate our first American meal when we pulled into an Arby’s (fast-food burger). We forgot how LARGE US sizes are and nearly died as a carton of “medium” fries stuck to our hearts and lungs.

The following day was mostly spent shopping. Prices on clothes were really low, but shopping for clothes isn’t something that excites me to the point of actually being able to write anything about it. As a bookstore employee I found it interesting to browse around a Borders bookstore. Canadian books are very expensive in comparison to books in the USA. This is something I’m going to write about another time because the reaction some Canadians have to this makes me want to go on a murder-spree. Anyway, we ate too much on a couple more occasions today and in the evening we went to a race track to watch some races. I think we probably lost more than we won, but not much. I have this annoying habit of picking an outsider and writing it down but not betting on it and refusing to tell anyone who it is. I then grin stupidly when it wins. As soon as I place an actual bet, it loses. I did this with three or four horses during the night and had we actually bet (and won) we would have left laughing with a case full of green notes. I even correctly guessed the first 3 horses in one race.

Our flying visit to Pennsylvania came to an end the next day. We had to leave fairly early as it is a long drive and we wanted to go back via the city of Eerie in New York State. It turned into a very long drive when we got a call from our hotel saying I’d forgotten my laptop. We were an hour and a half into the drive, so we basically lost 3 hours of driving time.

Eerie was cold. I dipped my feet into it and it made my bone-marrow scream in pain. It’s big as well. Just like all the great lakes. To my experience of living on a tiny island, these lakes may as well be the sea. The drive became even more frustrating because a bunch of Tamil “protesters” had blocked one of the main highways in Toronto. I don’t want to write more about that because I don’t want to give them the attention they’re looking for. The situation they are protesting is complicated and it’s hard to know the truth of what is going on. I did see video showing the Tamil protesters assaulting police officers, though.

Here’s a few pics of Eerie.